Happy Birthday to Me!

     This has has been a good but emotional week.  My birthdays are always a dreaded time because my birthdays as a kid were always special.  Without my mom, and as a adult I have really struggled with them. It is usually like just  another day which can be really depressing.  Over the past years, I have lost "friends" (due to my depression) and have lost family members through death. As a result of all of us getting older and getting busier in our own lives, I still can not come to terms about wanting to be closer with my family.  I have a wonderful husband and precious kids.  I am so thankful for my own family that is a safe haven and blessing to me.  I still struggle a lot with loneliness and yearn to have those few friends I can really be closer to as well.
     This year my birthday was relaxing and actually emotional. It started with my jazzercise girls getting together with me the night before to celebrate.  Just the fact that so many of them took time out of their schedule to come, really touched me.    I got to spend the next  day with Julio, going out to breakfast and watching a movie.  It was nice to have that time with him and enjoy just the two of us.  I was touched to get a few cards, and encouraging texts and notes from family and friends that let me know they cared and I was valued.  I received a card that I will always treasure from my dad that really touched my heart.  All this made me realize how many people I have that are apart of my support system and even when the loneliness/depression gets the best of me this time, there are people out there that truly care about me.  
     This weekend the celebration will end with Julio and I going out on a Birthday date alone to the melting pot.  I am so excited!  It will be so nice to enjoy a nice romantic dinner together.  This weekend is turning out to be a great two days of resting and spending quality family time.  My favorite kind of weekends!
     This week also brought about some expected challenges as I continued my journey of getting healthier.  I am very proud of how I handled them and the choices I made. Even though I can "splurge" once in a while, I can be proud of these successes and it shows how these changes are not temporary but permanent.  They are going to be a part of my life from now on.  I was able to eat foods that would be triggers and able to eat them in portion or able to go out to eat and make good choices.  For me, these are things I can celebrate as ways I am learning and growing.